1. Work an 8-hour shift at a mall in America during December.
2. Get into a car.
3. Drive to the nearest Wendy's.
4. At the drive-thru, ask for a 99-cent Crispy Chicken Sandwich.
5. Forget that buying and consuming meat is bad for the world.
6. Shout "wait'll you see my dick" through mouthfuls of said sandwich while speeding home.
7. Yes.
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